Morning Walks With My Mother

Getting out of bed in the morning has ceased to become an ordeal and a race against the clock to beat the rush hour going to work. Now, I wake up before my phone alarm sounds off, and instead of getting out of the house onto the perennially traffic-congested Ortigas Extension, I go the opposite way, up to the mountains, to Antipolo.

Unless it rains, I start my weekday mornings brisk walking up and down these asphalted, gentle slopes, between these rich vegetation...

and underneath the overlapping canopies. 

With my mother as my walking buddy, the experience has been something to look forward to each morning.

I have been posting on Instagram photos I have taken using my phone of this same place, with blah-blah captions that kind of tell a story or a lesson, which I hash-tag “morningwalkthoughts.” This morning, I decided to take my Canon EOS M (just telling, not bragging, hehe) and play with it.

I mentioned in a previous post that I would need to skill myself a bit on photography so I could post decent photos, worthy of internet space. I am such a lousy learner especially when I need to teach myself aided only by a manual. The camera came with instructional CDs, but I have not gotten around to opening them yet (understandably :-)). I have not really fully read the manual (even if I always have them in my bag, just in case). And so I just try exploring the camera’s features by pressing the functions (touch screen, btw). Amateur that I am, I am happy with the photos I took. These are far from a professional’s material, but, hey, they look pretty enough, and I am excited to share them with you with some bylines.

Nature touches the soul, reaches down deep within, taps into one’s natural desire for peace, beauty, and simplicity. It inspires. It rejuvenates. It makes one look up to the heavens, feeling thankful and blessed.

What inspires me to come to this place, walk this path, is not really the calories I get to burn, but more than that, it is experiencing nature - the lush greenery, the gentle breeze, the sightings of butterflies and spiders. It’s the beauty of it. I am one lucky mommy I know. I got a car pass to this lovely subdivision because my son’s school is located right here.

Awed by the details of this little creature...

the pretty little flowers that spring in spite of the seeming chaos,

the butterfly that nurtures itself and propagates beautiful little flowers,

 and the wonders of how life starts.

Sometimes, we go past pretty little things because we are too busy to stop, get down, and peer closely...

We tend to see the obvious...

and try hard to fit ourselves in.

Often, we blindly follow a path...

but have we stopped to check our bearings, where we are, and ask what we are looking for?

 Do we miss out on some details of our lives?

 (Did you see the pretty pink flowers?)

Going astray can get lonely...

We all follow a cycle.

It is a struggle to exist and be noticed... for each one competes for attention...

but in the end, we are our own selves...

 and it is our choice to live as beautiful as we can be.

Hello, September

Praying for good weather in September. This is the top of the hill where my mother and I have been hiking. 

What do you have in store for us? We pray you will not bring us typhoons and calamities like August did.  You’ve had a good start last Sunday, please keep it that way. Oh, you startled us with thunderstorms and heavy rains last night, but they were quick and just enough to let us enjoy the cool night.

I’d like to count your days with positive vibes even as we remember the victims of the martial law proclamation and the 9/11 attacks. Please let the Christmas cheers begin. J

---------

It’s been two months now since I have temporarily quit work. My friends ask me if I don’t miss it. My honest answer is that I don’t, not yet at least. Time flies, and maybe I’ve had no chance yet to feel restless. It’s been a happy daily routine of attending to my children’s needs and managing the household. I have more time to count my blessings and smell the flowers so to speak. My heart swells with happiness seeing Garrett and Gabee enjoying the time I spend with them, hearing their stories after school, watching them together. Gabee’s big smile as she runs to me when I pick her up from school is enough to make my day, and so does Garrett’s kiss when I drop him off to school each morning. I am thankful to my husband for making all these possible.

My leave from work also affords me more time with my 66-year-old mother. She is the true retiree. She says she wants to keep healthy so she’d live past her 80^th. She’s inspired by my grandmother who turns 90 this month. Nanay and I started our morning brisk walking date yesterday, and agreed to do it daily. J

Everything’s looking good leading up to Christmas. I become closer to being 40 on the 16^th. Got nothing to wish for, but everything to be thankful for. #TYL

Praying for Sunshine

I was happy with the progress I was churning out posts for this blog, until the weather became bad. I had put out nine posts for the month by August 16^th. Doing my crude Math tells me that I had been posting every other two days. No matter that only a handful are reading my corny posts. My intention is to write for myself mainly. This blog is just an online journal of sorts, something tangible I, my husband and children could read and re-read to remember times past – happy, sad, important and irrelevant events and whatever that I have written about. It’s great that I could share it to anybody who cared to read me. That sure is the highest flattery for me especially given my current status – full-time mom.

I was doing good until last Monday when typhoon Maring and Habagat (southwest monsoon) disrupted the nice trend. True, it’s very petty of me to be having these thoughts when as I write tens of thousands of people struggle to keep warm and safe; many lost their homes, properties and livelihood, and there were some who even lost loved ones.

The government estimates that at least 1 million people have been directly affected across three administrative regions, and at least eight people have died as of this writing. The area where I live has been placed under a state of calamity. Classes have been suspended for the entire week.

In the face of the tragedy that Maring and Habagat brought, it was difficult to write about irrelevant stuff that would have me thinking ME-ME-ME when around my safe haven, people were plunged into difficult circumstances that I and my family have been so fortunate to have been spared from. Natural disasters affect both poor and rich. I’m not rich by any measure of being rich is. But the blessings and provisions are such that I am awed and humbled, and VERY thankful.

My thoughts and prayers go out to the people that this recent calamity has affected – especially to those who have been plunged into greater poverty and would have to struggle so much more to at least get back to where they were before.

May the sun shine tomorrow.

Inspired by the Trees - Reflecting on Illness and Life

I love the feel of soft breeze on my face. These trees are such a refreshing sight. They remind me that life is a miracle. These trees have grown majestically through the years, reaching out their branches to the sun, forming leaves of myriad shapes, sizes, and textures. They grow faithfully according to their kind, from the seeds from which their little life first sprouted. It’s amazing when you think of it. And it’s wonderful to be blessed with the ability to see and appreciate them.

I’m going a little sentimental here, I know. It’s wonderful to be alive. I underwent a minor operation last Tuesday. I was having second thoughts writing about it, but this immense feeling of thankfulness that has hit me this moment prods me to reflect.

Many of you in my small circle of friends know that I have undergone two surgeries. They were technically brain surgeries as neurosurgeons accessed my brain to remove a benign pituitary tumor. My first surgery in 2007 failed to yield a 100% success rate, so I had to go under the knife again in 2009. The last one was a big success, thank God. I remain in remission, and I pray the tumor never recurs.

The operation I just had was done to remove nasal adhesions, a complication of the two previous surgeries. It was a minor procedure but it was still performed with me under general anesthesia. For the past week, I had a nose pack on to ensure that the nasal parts do not come in contact again. Today, I can again freely breathe, and I feel just wonderful!

Going under the knife is naturally scary. It jerked me off my state of complacency and nudged me back to reality – that life could end any minute. I was already a mother the first time, and as I was being wheeled into the operating room, all I could think of then was that I had a son. My prayer was not so much for me but more for my son. I was afraid to leave behind a 4-year-old boy (Garrett). I prayed hard I would be given a chance to live a full life to take care of him and see him grow.

On the second surgery, not only had I Garrett to think of – there was my daughter (Gabee), too, waiting for me to come back home. I had the surgery done in Singapore as chances of success were far better there given their advanced technology and more experienced neurosurgeons handling cases like mine. My husband accompanied me for two weeks, and saw me through two hospital confinements at Mount Elizabeth Hospital.

We went home on September 26, 2009 when Typhoon Ondoy (international name: Ketsana) had just inundated major parts of Metro Manila and nearby provinces. I came home healed, but amidst that epic flood that claimed unbelievably a great number of lives in just a matter of hours. It then hit me that life was indeed precious, and could be taken away just like that.

Like the trees that surround us, their Creator willed them to be such, the great Conductor to which their leaves and branches sway at His compass.

But unlike the trees whose growth is defined, we are given a hand in conducting our lives. Each day presents us an opportunity to grow according to His will.

My mission in life is clear. I am to nurture two creations to become as beautiful as they can be, to be as majestic as these trees. And I have realized that I can do that only through His grace and will.

Winner in God's Amazing Grace

Acromegaly is a rare medical condition. I’m one case in 3-4 of a million cases happening per year. Yep, that rare! Maybe because in most cases the disease is left undiagnosed until it manifests major complicating conditions, like diabetes and cardiovascular problems, which are then treated as the primary ailments.

Wikipedia better explains this rare disease:

Most pituitary tumors arise spontaneously and are not genetically inherited. Many pituitary tumors arise from a genetic alteration in a single pituitary cell which leads to increased cell division and tumor formation. This genetic change, or mutation, is not present at birth, but is acquired during life. The mutation occurs in a gene that regulates the transmission of chemical signals within pituitary cells; it permanently switches on the signal that tells the cell to divide and secrete growth hormones. The events within the cell that cause disordered pituitary cell growth and growth hormone oversecretion currently are the subject of intensive research.

I faced it head-on 1 Feb 2007 when I went in for surgery in Manila. The tumor that showed in my first MRI scans measured around 7mm. This was reduced post operation to a subtle 3mm. Between that time and last 16th of Sep, that subtle residual tumor had been insidiously affecting my life on the whole. I know I was not yet cured. I know the battle had not ended. And I know that there was still something that could be done. Something within my reach. Something that just needed me to will it to happen.

And on 16 Sep 2009, with one of the best neurosurgeons in Singapore, something amazing happened. I went under the knife (again) with a faith enough to ride any tide. It was an extraordinary day. For one, it was my 34th birthday. It was the 2nd time I was taking my chances of battling it out with an unheard of disease amongst my circles of family and friends. A post on Facebook before midnight immediately drew attention to my status, and all through the next day, messages poured in. The prayers whispered to God by family, relatives and friends from all around were truly amazing. Not only did they make me feel loved, they made me come out of the surgery cured. Yes, I have the gut feel, and the faith that I have defeated acromegaly finally. I have a whole life, maybe another 34 years, may be even more to look forward to. I can now happily picture myself in Gabee’s 18th birthday, Garrett’s college graduation, in both their weddings, and in many happy family occasions yet to happen.