I was not born rich. I am still not rich to this day. I was born to
a family with very humble means where food, house rent and education would be
covered first before any other expense. I inched my way to a better life with
the comforts of having a house and a car on top of the basics. It wasn't luck I
did so. It was with perseverance as a student, diligence as a worker, and an
answered prayer that I marry into a God-fearing family, one that raised the
kind of hardworking and honest man that was to be my husband. I believe God
presented opportunities along the way, shined His light on my path and allowed
me to take up these opportunities. The comforts I now enjoy are hard earned,
due in large part to the man I proudly call my husband. My struggles were nothing
compared to what he went through to finish college. I will not give his story
away without his permission. It’s enough that I say that I am very proud of how
far he has come since the time I knew him from college, and started dating him
right after graduating from the same university, around the time he was just
one of the tens of thousands of new job seekers.
In a country where the rich-poor divide continues to widen with
income inequality becoming more pronounced, the rich are pulling away, growing
their wealth. I don't personally know many rich people. I am not friends with
any one, at least not to my knowledge, nor have I relatives who live in
mansions and who can spend with no care.
I quickly checked related national statistics on income. Data last year
showed that 84% of the country's over 100 million population had to share
40% of the country's income. Put another way, a mere 16% took the lion's share.
That's the reality even with reports of the Philippines posting higher economic
growth than its neighbors in the region.
I am overwhelmed when I make an acquaintance with individuals who
you can easily say are rich, judging by their houses and cars. The few that I
know of are very humble ones who speak and act with grace, oozing of
personality honed by breeding. They do not flaunt jewelries nor tote bags in
the Prada – Hermes category. They dress simply, belying the signature brands
they're wearing. I was recently welcomed into a home of a mom who shares the
same concerns with her child as I. I went gaga over the loveliness of their home. I was served coffee and suman at a patio overlooking the metro. Not
used to this kind of experience, I was impressed, taking in the country-like yet
very elegant details of how the refreshments were served. I would have liked to
take photos, but of course, I couldn’t. Such an act would have been totally
off. It was a normal thing for them. It was not for me. I was so delighted to
see the juice pitcher topped with an embroidered coaster, the coffee press, the
wooden tissue holder, the cups and saucers in blue, and shiny white dessert plates. I held back from eating more than one suman. Goodness me! I was not
taught how to act in a setting like that. I was afraid I’d give myself away, I
only touched the coffee after my host poured herself a cup.
It must be nice living in a big house like that. I could only dream
about it. It would be hard to maintain a place like that. It needs cleaners and
gardeners. Fancy that? Yeah, who wouldn't, right? But my reality is such that I have a house I can
clean myself, where every room and corner is lived in, where dogs make it hard
to have a manicured garden. And I can’t ask for more, really. If there’s one
thing I would like to have that the “rich” seem to share, it is social graces.
I would like for my children to be mindful of table manners, for my daughter to
know how a lady is supposed to sit, dress, smile, and kiss. It’s not really to
keep up appearances, but it is more to train them to conduct themselves always
in a graceful way. We will start by using table napkins and knives during
meals. And with a constant note to myself to speak softly, act gracious and courteous
all the time. But that’s a feat! J
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